Archive for the ‘ Awesome Quotes ’ Category

Hey Miami, Machiavelli Will Not Be Impressed

“It is not titles that make men illustrious, but men who make titles illustrious.” –Machiavelli

Ok so he may or may not have been talking about NBA titles here, but it still works. Having 2 of the top 3 or 4 players in the league (the world?) Chris Bosh, and Pat Riley running things, is kinda like being handed at least one NBA title. So the tile(s) that these uncompetitive douchers win are not really going to enhance their image or legacies at all. Nobody will ever think of any of them as the greatest ever. It will be remembered more as “Hey remember when those guys all played together? That was cool.” They will not be made illustrious by winning titles together in Miami.

Wade’s performance in the 06 finals made him illustrious. What Kobe has done post-Shaq has made him illustrious. What LeBron should have finished in Cleveland would have made him illustrious. Nobody is going to be impressed by this Miami team unless they go undefeated. I am hoping we will be disappointed.

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Another Black Quote

“I would like to believe the earth was created in six days, but the problem is that i think. And nothing fucks up faith more than a good thought.” –Lewis Black

Another awesome quote from Mr. Black. If put some good thought into any religon stories you will begin to notice a few things. First of all, you would probably notice that there is no way that the majority of these things actually happened things like noahs arc, burning bushes, talking snakes, evil apples, etc. Thats all nonsense. I find it really hard to believe that there are people who are in their 30s who think these were actual events that transpired. I remember being 10 in religious school and thinking “wait.. What? This sounds like the cartoons i watch on tv.” It blows my mind that there are fully grown adults who think that shit happened.

Another thing you will probably notice is that all religions are basically the same. They all basically teach the same principles, just with different characters and metaphors. They were just ways for primitive humans to try to get people to behave and maintain order, and also to explain things they knew nothing about. Thats it. No difference between the major religions of today and greek mythology, or short stories of today such as The Boy Who Cried Wolf. Was there actually ever a boy who was eaten by a wolf because he lied too many times about it at first? Who knows. Thats no the point. It doesn’t matter. The point is to have a simple story to kids not to lie.

Black Quote

“Do you need god to live a spiritual life? I suppose so, if youre desperate for an authority figure whos invisible, but can be tasted in communion. Cant you just practice what jesus preaches and live a good and upright life. Isnt that spiritual enough? What if you did do that, and because you didnt believe in god he asent you to hell? Well for me that would surely justify not believing in him in the first place. Especially if hes gonna be such a prick.” –Lewis Black, from his book, Me of Little Faith

I love this quote because it says exactly what I’ve always thought, but in a better way than i could’ve said it. I don’t claim to know whether or not a god exists. Almost everything is explainable by science. Science basically disproves every story in the bible, if logic failed to do so beforehand. That is, to a point. There are still some things which science cannot yet explain, such as the origin of the universe, and when scientists cannot explain something, they may even attribute it to a god factor. So who the hell knows? I don’t. Anyone who says they know for sure are full of shit.

What I do know is that I don’t need there to be a god in order to be a good person. If i am going to do something, it’s because it’s what I believe is the right thing to do, not because I think it’s waht Jesus would do. I have my own morals and values that I have developed and am still developing. I rarely went to church or read the bible as a youngster, but I was still able to conclude that its probably a bad idea to murder or steal or lie. I didn’t need a book to figure that out. But thats just me.

If you want to read the bible for inspiration, cool. There are some awesome passages and quotes that can definitely help you be a better person. But its no different than quotes from Einstein or Martin Luther King Jr., except that we know those people definitely existed. It is when you start taking the stories literally that it becomes foolish. A giant boat with every animal and insect on it for 40 days? Come on. I mean, come on.